Blog of the Day

okay i know i know, by the time i’m writing this, it’s already 2nd of january 2010. maybe a little bit too late to say bye bye to 2009 but who cares, i’m writing anyway

so what’s up with 2009? well there’s quite a few things happened in 2009. pretty major things too. not much i can remember, but there’s quite a few that i’d like to capture before my brain gets so old and then i’d just start to forget things.

to start everything off, 2009 is the last year of me studying in unversity. to be able to finish off the long bile-la-nak-abes-blaja-ni period of 4 years, it couldn’t be any sweeter than that. there’s a sense of freedom jugak kot. knowing that you’d be on your own from there, that’s the scary part of it. but other than that, that was really nice

and then there was the trip to indonesia with my housemates. one last trip to both bandung and jakarta, that was awesome! it’s really a wonderful experience. it’s just i wish i had more money to spend on then. but no worries, i’m determined to save a lot and spend some more next time! sape nak ikut, jom!

then there was a hibernating period. for me, hibernating period is somewhen between finishing school and getting an offer. it felt like i’ve just finished my spm papers and then duduk umah golek2 without doing anything, literally. i’ve had my own sweet time of bangun lambat hari-hari (haha, what an honest confession), and watching tv all day, complete with the csi’s and house and everything else. i’m kinda missing this whole things now, i guess.

finally the letter came in, that i got my very first job as a pharmacist in NPCB in 2009. so yeah, then came in the pay slip after a couple of months. and then it’s the year of me earning my own money. and the sad part was that in 2009 i had to bayar hutang to ptptn. wuwuwu there goes my gaji T_T

and somewhen after that, the next thing i know, i was spending my gaji on tudung raye lah, baju raye lah, and also shoes for my convocation. the long-awaited convo. and then there were flowers and gifts and smiles everywhere. the best part of it is to be able to meet my classmates and housemates. gossiping around was really fun! and also to get kad kawin from my housemate

to finish the year off, of course, december. lots and lots of weddings. there were surya’s and my cousin shikin’s. congratulations!!! majlis yg meriah, two thumbs up for both and also engagements, congrats to aisha and kak azie jugak!

and also, i missed the part when i cried bile send off hana kat airport sebab dier nak further master kat manchester. and then there’s the part of confessing everything to her, and also to aisha and inda, and also to everyone else. the part of going public about the man in my life. and to take the man to see my parents, waaahhh takotnyeeeee! but everything turned up just nice and good

so that’s all for my 2009. wishing a better year for 2010. happy new year everyone!

well it’s been exactly one month of me working now. lots of people had blogged on their first day, or first week of working, but i chose to blog after the first month instead. no reason in particular, really.

so what exactly happened? it’s simple. i got an offer letter saying that i got a job in National Pharmaceutical Control Bureau (NPCB) in PJ and i was so very much thankful for that. it’s very much near to everyone that i love, but then i started to get worried about what’s the job like.

so i went on googling for hours. to find as much information as possible, just to get myself mentally prepared for the job. and so, i ended up in sites like pharmacist’s blogs ( who did their training in NPCB ) and also googlemap ( because i simply have no sense of direction and absolutely no idea how to get there ).

it occurs to me that it’d be helpful for other pharmacists who will be trained at NPCB to have a rough idea about NPCB because the blogs that i read weren’t that helpful sangat la. and so, let me tell you a bit of NPCB. well, ade 5 major departments in it, they call them as ‘Pusat’. so ade 5 Pusat, abbreviated as PKK, PPO, PPPP, PPP, and PKP (aka GMP). so the first P is of course, pusat and the next would be like, kawalan kualiti, pembangunan organisasi, pasca something2 ( haha i don’t even know the whole name), pendaftaran produk, and good manufacturing practice. so each PRP will be rotated in each pusat, with one of them being the major pusat. so we’ll have one month in each pusat, and 5 months in the major pusat. for me, i’ll be in PPP for 5 months, tapi tu pun the last 5 months of being PRP la.

and you’d probably wondering, that’d be only 5+1+1+1+1 = 9 months only. well, there’ll be 3 months in hospital and 2 weeks in enforcement. yep, enforcement and NPCB are totally 2 different things. NPCB is only regulatory kind of thing but in enforcement they said that you actually get to raid shops and stuff. we’ll see.

so, enough of the rotation already. how’s work? well, in this first month, i was in PKK, and under PKK there was like 6 or 7 units more, so i was placed under GC (general chemistry). what i did was not pharmacist’s actual work, but i got to do experiments involving quality control of drugs and learnt lots of new technical things. in GC, basically all we play with is spectrometry, so i got to learn in infrared and ultraviolet. my daily ‘toys’ were methanol and chloroform and ether, to name a few.

so the hardest part of it was getting to know new people, and trying to know how they work, and tyring hard to cope with them, and then leran new things and then leave the whole department just to start over in new department. and then get to know new things again, and the cycle begins. well i guess that’s the whole idea of training, isn’t it?

dan sesungguhnye saye bersyukur sgt dapat kat NPCB, walopun hari2 jammed pun takpe la, saye redha. this whole new world of going to work and the idea of me earning my own money keeps me excited. looking forward to the next department. until next entry then, tata!

2 months of holiday. if you ask me whether that’s enough, i’d say a simple no. even lepas spm pun i managed to guling-guling-and-do-nothing for a total of almost 3 months, let alone 8 weeks.

okay, so one of my favourite things to do during holiday is reading my friends’ blogs. and an entry from a friend made me realized how much i miss going to class. how bad i want to turn back time and just be with my friends. and do things that we did. huuu menulis ngan emo nye, ko nye pasal la ni surya

but as what they say, life moves on. no matter how hard it can be, we just have to move on. walopun tak dapat official letter lagi, i kinda like the idea of going to work. well, first of all, it’s the money!!!! hahaha mari beramai2 mintak cuti mase j-day nanti!

and plus, it’s a whole new environment, new faces, new things to learn. it’s kinda refreshing in some way. it makes you grow up. to accept more responsibilities. to manage your life even more effectively.

well i’m a bit excited, a bit anxious, a bit scared and a bit of everything when it comes to stepping into a new world. a step closer into achieving what i want in life, i hope

well basically baru jek abes bace blog blog sume orang. and i am so tempted to put an entry here. and plus bile tengok kat facebook and everyone is like uploading their recent photos with all the memories and videos and everything else, it somehow make me sad. ye mesti la sebak kan, kalo tak sedih langsung tipu la tu.

so the day is finally here. i’m done with the schooling part!!! i remember when i was in first year and wishing that i’d graduate as fast as possible simply because i couldn’t bear the pain of studying and memorising things for tests and exams. and all those nights when i chanted : aku nak tukar course aku nak tukar course aku nak tukar course. tapi last2 tak tuka course pun. haha, i actually survived the 4 years, yay!

and basically i grew up during these years. yep with lots of laughters, a bit of pain. and i’m so going to miss all these. that seat kat DK H, staring blankly during lectures, doodling in my notebook with awful drawings. nasik lemak jati, abc pakcik kat seksyen 2, tgk wyg ngan budak umah. and countless hours of playing gamessssss i can list a whole lot more of these. tak muat kot nak tulis sume skali.

though i’m gonna miss all these, life moves on. hey, we’ll never know, maybe i’d end up being in the same working places with my friends, maybe i’d see them somewhere somewhen. maybe i get to catch them during a seminar or a meeting or whatever it is the job requires me to do later. and of course, lots of kenduri kawen to attend to after this, so reunion with friends is always possible.

so kawan kawan yg disayangi sekalian, this is not the end. we’ll part and say our bye byes now, but the memories remain here in our hearts. and we’ll carry them just about everywhere we go.

it’s not the end of us. it’s a beginning of good, life-long friendships. until we meet again sayang korang sume.

i simply can’t sleep tonight, explaining the blogging i’m doing right now. so basically there’s nothing to talk about here, it’s just gonna be a total rambling (like i always do) sebab effect amik caffeine (i had ice-blended coffee during dinner, degil nak amik jugak, pdn muke takleh tido mlm ni)

but i don’t blame it all on the coffee. it’s life itself. it’s just me. i have been so terrible in managing my life. i skipped my meals. i have less hours of sleeping every night. i allow my heart to beat faster than it should most of the time. based on these, i probably have hypertension plus anxiety attack at the age of 30, yg mane saye mintak jauh la sgt. tanak la muda2 lagi dah sakit bukan bukan, ye tak?

sekarang ni, 24 hours a day is never enough for me. i don’t wish there’s more than just 24 hours per day, but there were so much things to do (but most of the time i’m the one who’s doing things really slowly, so salah sendiri lah) and so little time to complete everything.

there were times when i wished (so bad) i could somehow clone myself, or split myself into hundreds of me so i can be there for everyone. to do things that i have to do and i want to do.

i want to be at home for my parents, just keeping them company when no one is around. to be that makcik for the little ones, to just drive them to mcdonalds for their happy meals. to be that bibik for the new born baby, yg buangkan pampers, buatkan susu. to be that listener for a really good friend who just fell for a guy she’s not sure she can have. to be the one who can make it to the trips for just another fun adventures. to be the one who completed her chores and all the other work on time. to meet up with old friends for updates on their lives. to be able to have some time for herself, fixing herself up - maybe a hair cut, maybe some shopping spree. to do things that she enjoys most: just a simple 5 minutes online games or just another movie with popcorn. to go out all day and freeze the time with the one whom she wants to be with the most. 

but it’s simply not possible to split myself, i don’t even know how to handle all these. has anyone ever seen ‘managing life for dummies’ ? maybe you should get me one of those for my birthday next year thank you in advance, haha!

so here’s the thing : tiap-tiap kali jumpe haiqal, mesti dia tak nak kawan. i don’t actually know why he doesn’t like me so much. his pronunciation of ‘L’ suddenly turned to ‘W’ for the past few months for no obvious reason. so everytime he sees me, he’d be yelling “TANAK KAWAN AUNTIE AWINNNNN!!!” and he’d stick out his little fore finger out as if he wants to shoot me. hey he even managed to ’shoot me dead’ a couple of times before using his bubble gun

and today, i went to this family day near titiwangsa, with the whole family. my niece alisa just happened to get scared when the children there were running around in the games. biase la, carik gula2 dlm tepung, bawak bola pingpong dalam sudu, isi air dlm botol, tiup belon sampai pecah, the list goes on. at about 12 pm, my sister went home earlier with her husband, saying she’s a bit tired. and the rest of us went home later on, only to find out she’s admitted to the hospital, and went into the labour room a couple of hours later.

what i’m to tell here is that i have a new nephew!!! his name is hafeey adlan. pretty fair, and he has the ears like my father’s. lots of hair, and mata cam sepet sket. really cute.

for me, a birth is always a miracle. there’s this indescribable joy in hearing the baby cries, in seeing that gentle face, and that smell of a new born baby. and then you started to wonder what it’ll be like when the baby starts to talk or walk or laugh.

so yeah, the next time haiqal ’shoots’ me again, i’d just say : takpe la haiqal tanak kawan auntie alin. auntie ade kawan baru. auntie alin kawan ngan adlan je nanti yek’

haha kejamnye bunyik!  >:)

i just had the most hectic weekend, and it’s one of the best weekends in my life!

Friday :
it started off with a sleepover. i invited a few friends for a sleepover at my house and then we talked and talked and talked some more as if we haven’t seen each other for five years. we had our little yoga session ( funnily we feel like we’re getting so old, and that we need to be concern more on health, haha! ) and they even got me gifts. and we talked the night away and fell asleep really late. well i was the first one to sleep, so i had no idea how late they’ve stayed up that night.

Sunday :
i woke up just in time that morning. then i went out with another group of friends. to the same mall i did on the other day we were early and the long queue wasn’t there yet, so yay! we watched this movie ‘made of honour’. and we ate and we talked and it was so much fun considering i haven’t meet them for quite some time then. and at the end of the day, rain started to pour and we had to say quick bye-byes and rushed back home.

and everyday of my life, i am so very very grateful to have these wonderful circle of friends

it’s 4 pm and i should really be doing some studying now. but to be frank, blogging is so much fun and staring at the screen is way better than to be looking at those notes with lots and lots of words (not to mention diagrams and flow chart and all). i can’t even stand looking at them, and how am i supposed to actually read them?
let’s face it, i’m freaking out. thanx to my own habit of doing things at 11th hour, so yeah, padan muka sendiri..
at this point, i almost lose control of myself, trying to do everything at once, to be everywhere, and to make things good for everyone, all at the same time.
so, i think i need to fix myself. in other words, i need to prioritize. even if that means pulling out the plugs of my computer and throw it away, so far away so i don’t go crawling to this friendster. well at least until the exam is over. i’ve done it before and i’m going to do just that again.
i really really need to do this to myself.
so wish me luck and see how far i can go this time.

this entry is exclusively for those who think that i’ve gone nuts for the past couple of weeks.

i think i owe quite a number of people an explanation for my extremely crazy behaviour lately. i’m really sorry, but things have been crazily happy for me, i can’t control myself.

there are times when i actually lose control of myself. sometimes i talk too fast,  sometimes i don’t talk at all because i don’t know what to say or because i am thinking too hard of what to say. sometimes i don’t feel like eating, sometimes it feels so hot that my face is all red and i’d just sweat like i just had a 1000 miles marathon. sometimes i don’t keep my priorities straight. sometimes i’d just smile and i can’t stop smiling.

well it’s simple, i am hiding something from you.

but let me tell you, i’m not so much of a good liar. everytime i try to lie, it will be written all over my face.

by now you probably wonder what is it that i’m hiding from you. you probably have some guesses and perhaps one of them is correct.

well most of you guessed it right, so let’s just stop there. i won’t be entertaining any question, so please spare me the interrogation.

for those who’s trying hard to decipher the whole mystery, you can try reading my mind and my words and also the invisible words between the lines. it’s there, really.

goooooooooood luck!

i’ve just read a friend’s blog, maka secare separa sedarnye saye terpanggil la utk memblog jugak. and since i’m don’t log into friendster quite often now ( now i’ve got an account in facebook as well), i guess it won’t hurt to blog once in a while.
especially on those few nights where you should be doing your work or assignment or revision or something, hehehe

things have been hectic, it’s true. but i guess that’s life. i’m gonna have to find some time for everything. even if it means that i can’t sleep at night, so be it. it’s life. and i have never been so full of life than right now.